Attraction and Initiation. Love at first sight has often been the target of refutation; mainly by those who cannot attract it. Is it possible? You bet it is! Love at first sight is linked to the concept of “form follows premise,” and stems most clearly from the puppy-love of our first crushes in youth. First loves are our first rudimentary social connections to personal value. It grows well beyond that with time, but one can see crucial values in another—traits worthy of love—just by looking at them.
Beyond love at first sight, preparation is necessary for romantic encounters. First in the hierarchy of attraction is to please another’s perceptions. Everyone appreciates someone who is clean, fresh, together and vibrant; the elements of beauty, most of which can be acquired. The first essential element of romantic beauty is sparkling, fiery eyes, conveying all that is possible in the anticipation of living. Second is excellent posture, being alert and aware with a backbone and no rolled shoulders. This conveys that one is joyously ready for exciting action. Third is respecting one’s health and cleanliness, having low to no fat, being toned if not sculpted, and well groomed. Fourth, that one’s overall facial structure and expression is driven by premise, with strong, hard, clear features. We smile with our eyes too, which should be steady, revealing joy, self-esteem and intelligence. Fifth is one’s style and sensuality—our way,the mildly suggestive enjoyment of relaxed physical motion and frank interest. The sixth and final element is natural beauty—which can be maintained, but otherwise lies outside the virtue of the entity. All, even the sixth, can be changed, improved, and honed into art. As one develops towards a working model of excellence, inessentials which don’t appear to reflect an ideal, get dismissed in the overwhelming positivism of other traits.
There is a very small percentage of people hopeless in the quest to spark romantic fantasy in the eyes of another. The majority have a virtual well of untapped sensual ability lying dormant underneath a layer of fearful evasion, unwillingness, or simple unawareness, through a lack of exposure to the possibilities.
Warrior Note:If you ask the elderly what they regret most in their lives, it’s never what they did, it’s what they didn’t do, what they held themselves back from doing. What if approaching her could alter both your destinies? Don’t miss out.
Traits desired must reflect traits acquired, so he must gain a conscious understanding of the level of suitor his aura will attract. With the Self-made traits of character, commitment to growth, emotional openness, mature responsibility, honesty, dependability, high self-esteem, positive sense of life and the resulting capacity for love, his options are good. If he expects more, then he has to becomemore. As one-half of the encounter, he must be comfortable approaching people he doesn’t know. Engaging with confidence and without pretense is the key. Decent people are never rude to a sincere approach, but if he is nervous and uncomfortable, he can expect others to be uncomfortable with him. A key to removing the fear is to be complete withouther. If his core purpose is established and his life is deeply satisfying, approaching will be much easier. Regardless, he doesn’t expect to win until he has it mastered, and he keeps trying until he has. He works on what he wants to convey until women respond well. Just as he brings his mind into focus to perform in life, he practices pure perceptivity in initial attraction, consciously controlling his fear until his patterning has devoured it, where he can remain bright and alert, open and friendly. He engages as an adventure, using the adrenaline as stimulation to heightenhis perception, not to limit it. Eventually he enjoysthe thrill and risk of fully open senses. He is still dominant and sovereign, but not intimidating and not intimidated, ready to acknowledge her value alongside his own. He is a sexual being without regret or apology, and in the presence of a desirable woman, that interest always exists somewhere in his glance. He is the foundation, in control of himself and in control of them both, at her will. Once he has it mastered, he can relax and observe her half; what she brings to the table.
He does not limit himself as to whereto find her. Often it’s claimed that work is notthe place to find a mate, but nothing could be further from the truth. Here is a place where both have a core mutual interest, much less superficial than the content of most dates and social gathering places. No activity could prove more affirming and consonant than how we carry out the business of life. If we can be professional about it, then management can too. At best, pursuing one’s purpose is the most powerful realm to meet one’s soul mate—there is no deeper, more dynamic a parallel to be made between individuals.
During courtship, he doesn’t put extravagant effort or cost into activities he never intends to do as an established couple. He does normal things, at reasonable expense. He doesn’t change his lifestyle to gain the relationship; it must fit within his scale and desired direction. He takes her to enjoy experiences along his own lines of interest to learn whether she can handle and appreciate them, as they share hers. Both contribute in turn, neither being shielded from the financial realities we all must acknowledge and respect.